Do you hate confrontation?

​Lots of thoughts find their way to my head whenever I get a chance to sit by a pool (lol) I still don’t know why so please don’t ask me, as I stared into the blue color of the sky I remembered a very ugly scene from way back in my head. A particular friend of mine in secondary school all of a sudden stopped talking to me, I tried all I could to know what was wrong but she wasn’t ready to say, while I was talking to a mutual friend of ours I expressed my worries about our friend who hasn’t spoken to me in a while, she pretended to be bothered and faked making peace between both of us, went behind my back and said God knows what to our friend. 

I wouldn’t know what they both said but the whole thing turned out so bad, made me cry and ruined my friendship with them. 

I realized after so many years that if I had confronted the situation it wouldn’t have turned out to be that bad at the time. 
Now, I must say If you ask my very few friends if I like confrontation, they would boldly answer yes!.  
Let’s see what does confrontation means? 
Confrontation : An argumentative meeting between two parties. 
It took me very long time before I could start confronting both people and situation because I felt I didn’t want to displease the other person or want them to feel bad about themselves. As I grew in wisdom and experience I realized sometimes when you confront a situation it becomes less difficult for you. There are so many people in our society today who do not love confrontation, even while those they love are hurting them they prefer to suffer in silence. 
Well, I would have said it’s okay but no! It is not okay. There is need to understand that confrontation isn’t about starting a fight or war, it’s about addressing problems, issues, and finding solutions to them. when you refuse to confront issues 

One thing is clear, you begin to resent people involved secretly and when resentment sets in it causes strain on relationships and then you withdraw away from those relationships. It is quite hard telling people what you don’t like about their actions, words but at the end of the day, it helps both you and the other party become better people

I know lots of people who lost their jobs, marriages, friends and lots more because the couldn’t dare ask question or confront a situation they found themselves in, sometimes most of us decides to keep quiet about a whole lots of things because of “what if he/she gets angry? 
What if am wrong at the end? 

What if I loose him or him? 

But have you ever asked yourself what if I loose my inner peace thinking of how hurtful this has made me?.  

In my opinion, I think there is absolutely no harm done in been confrontational. All we need to know is there are different ways to confront different people. For instance If an elderly person does or says something you need to clarify, you don’t go in the persons face all rude and ready to fight no! You have to be matured and respectful at the same time trying to know why and how of matter. Before you decide to confront a situation here are few tips you might need to know, 
What exactly it is you’re against in the situation. 
Be sure to know what you feel and how you feel

Be ready to listen to the other person without been defensive. 

Be composed and don’t put your hands in their face while trying to talk. 

Be sure you are free of anger or emotions that could escalate the situation. 

The most important of all is be ready to reach a conclusion or a solution. 

It’s time to stop the “letting it slide” attitude while you become a bitter person gradually. It’s time to ask question when you’re not clear, speak up when you’re hurt and experience  peace in your heart . 
Have a fruitful day. 
Love 
Jemima. 

Hello there..

​Sorry for the long break dear friends, have been away making sure I had a  sound body and mind

. I hope everyone is good? thanks for your calls and mails I really do appreciate. I am back now and better. 

Two days ago while I was drown in my sleep, suddenly my phone rang and I struggled between picking or ignoring, well, since it was a business line, I had to pick. after five minutes of talking to my client, the phase “sold out” a phase I often use for business popped up in my head. I went still for a while, trying to know why the word “sold out”  kept coming up, then it dawned on me, and I asked myself, What are you sold out to?.  
I realized the word “sold out” carries more weight than I thought, that question sounds quite easy to answer. yet, you need to do some soul searching before you answer. So I ask again, what are you sold out to? 
Let me tell you a little about been sold out. to be sold out, means to be totally committed, to give all, to be devoted to a cause. 

 It’s sad to know the world we live in right now, is a world where there are excuses for doing evil, wrong. No one really cares about what others feel as long as it’s going to benefit them, it saddens my heart when I see people who really can’t be their brother’s keeper. No one really wants to see their fellow human become more successful. 

We need to always remember that there is a legacy to leave behind after we are gone, but this legacy would only be determined by what we were sold out to while we were here. So, in other to be sure of what to do right, you need to ask yourself what are you sold out to? Are you sold out to evil or good, are you sold out to jealousy or envy, is it by any means money, fame or power ? Are you sold out to God or to the devil? When you search your soul and find out what it is you’re sold out to, then that becomes a driving force for you to live a life worthy of testimonies. 
So I would ask you again, what are you sold out to? 
I am sold out to God, I am sold out to good deeds!!. 
Love 
Jemima. 

Attitude is everything.

Hi everyone, how are we?…
Today, am going to be talking about something very sensitive and most importantly something directed at beautiful women out there. I will start with this question, has anyone ever come across some people and all you wish was to have them around you everyday because they are twice as good? Or on the other hand, you wish you never had anything to do with them again not even at the gate of heaven?. It pains me to know a lot of women in our generation do not subscribe to the “school of good attitude “. Yes! Women.. Ehn ehn don’t roll your eyes at me right now.

According to dictionary meaning of attitude,  “it is the manner, feeling or disposition you have in regards to a person or thing“. Our generation therefore has made good attitude seem like hardworking. The new phase now is “you have to be mean, to be known” which is quite sad though.

Woman, am not going to list all the good and bad attitude of this life down here, but I will definitely tell you that when you are known to be rude, proud, mean, dirty, nonchalant, unserious and much more you do need to go on a lunch break with you attitude. All am saying is check your attitude!. Don’t get me wrong, both men and women are not excused from bad attitude, but in the week of women’s day, my focus today is on women because I am a woman.

Woman! There is no excuse for your bad attitude, and do not say because someone treated you bad, everyone at a point in their life was treated badly, but some people did not sell their good soul to the devil for it. There is nothing sexy and classy about a bad attitude! “Yes I said so” if you find it difficult making people comfortable around you, getting people to listen or talk to you, or even getting people to help you. You need to check your self like I said earlier something is not right, it could be you or people around you but something isn’t right.

Maybe you know your attitude is bad and you really hope to do something about it, then you need to ask people this time I mean your close friend or families who do not mind telling it as it is. Ask them to help you by telling you some of the things you’re doing wrong and start working on your self, be willing to listen to what they have to say without been offended Gradually and you will get there.

I would also advice strongly you read the book of proverbs 31, Esther and Ruth. Those are women who made it through with good attitude and I believe strongly you can do it too.

“People might not remember your face after a while, but they will always remember their experience with you. “

Kisses and hugs
Jemima.

Finding your place.

I am really not sure what I would be writing exactly, but am sure you will be inspired by one or two things I say.

There are times we feel this emptiness tearing us apart, we keep wondering what exactly is wrong with us, why do I feel so unhappy, why are others happy and I can’t seem to find a reason to be? and the question goes on and on. These questions are often ask in the course of doing our jobs, or even while you’re in a relationship. Well the simple truth about it is, you just haven’t found your place yet!.

Do not get me wrong, “THE PLACE” I mean here doesn’t necessarily mean our location, but that comfort zone, that thing that gives you joy, that feeling of been fulfilled, that’s what I mean by “THE PLACE”. there was a point in my life, literally everything just wasn’t looking like it. at a point, I thought it was the people around me that were not getting it right, it took the help of God to realize I wasn’t in my place yet. That was when I understand why everything was out of place.

My question to you is, have you found your place?.
Let me tell you this, there is always a place for everyone, but not anywhere you are is you own place. At times, it takes a lot of going round a circle before you can finally find you own place, but the most important thing is, you tried finding it. I have come to realize that, having peace of mind has to do with finding your place.  it is therefore important to know that, sometimes the only way you can locate your own right place is to be in a couple of wrong places.

I would love to tell you this, the easiest way to finding your own place is through God, there is no other short cut about it. It’s either you go through him which makes it easier and faster, or you keep assuming a place that isn’t yours and it looks like everything in you and around you is stagnant. Trust me, I have tried both and take my advice, the one with God is best. Knowing your place not only gives you a sense of belonging, but also gives you a sense of fulfilment.

My advice to you dear friend is, ask your self these questions AM I IN MY PLACE? if yes, then all you need to do is pray for the grace to remain in that place without defaults. if your answer is no, then you need to ask your self HOW DO I FIND MY PLACE?.

finding your place might not be all that easy, but trust me it is all worth it.

Hugs and kisses
Jems.

My thoughts for someone out there.

At 12am in the morning, my eyes still wide open. Millions of thoughts in my head, where do I begin? This article is for someone out there, who thinks they do not have any reason to celebrate love, life and all the beautiful things in it. My thoughts to you is, DO NOT GIVE UP!!

Have you ever wondered why some of these things are happening to you and not anyone else? well let me tell you this, if it was going to be more than you, it wouldn’t have come your way. I do believe every life event is a training ground, another opportunity for you to rise above where you were before, All you need to do is make up your mind to stand up and come out of that situation, tell yourself you can come out as a winner with God’s own strength and there you go. There is a strength that is deposited inside of you that cannot be owned by someone else, It doesn’t matter how long you’ve allowed yourself to be swallowed by the situation you can still come out of it. live every moment with total faith in your heart that you’re a conqueror.

I want you to know there is always a reason to smile and be happy. The fact that God made you in his own very special image, it’s a joy on its own. Do not allow any circumstance to weigh you down. Do not give room to the devil. Get up and Get going. You need to stay strong for you!.

Hugs and kisses.
Jems.

What are you grateful for?

Hi everyone, how are you today? I am looking forward to a blessed week are you?. If I don’t say this I will practical burst… The response I get on each article is so beautiful, and am so glad am able to inspire people in this little way thank you so much for the love and support.

Today, I will be talking about a very sensitive topic, a thought I would like to share with you. You should all know by now “I can think for Africa” but it’s just fun and I love it.

It was a very powerful praise section in church, I should let you know, I am a crazy worshipper of God I am crazy about God I dance, and I mean dance with my all when it’s God. So as I was dancing, singing and shouting my head off, lost in the most high realm, I noticed a lady who seems to be unhappy about my way of praising God, she told a friend to let me know I was taking it too personal Choi!! Chineke !!! did you just say am taking praising God too personal? I sincerely felt like sending her back to Mars where she belongs, but am sure those in Mars well (if there are people) also praise God and she might not be okay with that too. wait, am sorry if I don’t subscribe to the “tush” and “classy” way of worship by raising up a finger to shout hallelujah. God has never been nonchalant about my case.

If I may ask, have you ever asked about how much a cylinder of oxygen cost in the hospital or how many of the cylinders you would need to take to survive 24 hours? Oh you didn’t have a reason to right? I guess so. When I remember how the little children of that sick woman I saw at the hospital kept praying for their mother to fart, then I know I am ungrateful. Think about it, if all God did for you was to make you sleep and wake up, then you should thank him every seconds.

Most times, we get so carried away by our problems and needs that we forget to thank him for the problems he solved for us even when we didn’t know about their existence. Some people even get so cautious of their cloths and shoes in other not to get it wet or dirty by dancing who are you kidding? What is the designer you wear when the creator of the body soul decides to take it all? Haven’t you read about king David, how he forgot about the people and the royal garments when he started praising and dancing.

You want to compose yourself so that guy or lady you’re admiring or admires you don’t start laughing at you while you dance to glorify God?! The people that would possibly leave you when trials and tribulation comes and there’s no one but God to turn to! So how do you expect someone you do not acknowledge to help you?. You need TO repent and start praising God like never before, because in praising God there is victory, blessings, deliverance uncountable benefits. I don’t know how nice I can say this, but “WHEN YOU DO NOT PRAISE GOD, YOU END UP NOT BEEN RAISED UP”.

Maybe the reason that problem isn’t solved is because you have never praised him for the ones he solved for you. The reason why you keep getting frustrated at anything you do, is because you never said thank you for giving me. So I would say this, get down on your kneels, tell God how sorry you are, and start living a life of praise. Trust me he will definitely change your story for good.

Remember to praise him all through this week and see doors open up for you.

Hugs and kisses
Jemima.

Me, My resolution, and I

Hi, happy new year to MLT readers for been there all the way. Thanks for always creating time to read all I have to say here, you’re the best! Happy 2016, it’s our year of “Glory to Glory “.
I have always heard people talk about having a new year resolution and sincerely it’s a really good thing. But wait, does that mean a person without a new year resolution isn’t in the new year yet? Okay, will leave you to answer that. Seriously, I believe in planning your year ahead. it really is very helpful, it keeps you focused. My sincere question to you is, how successful have you been with your resolution?

I would like to say everyone should always work towards a better last year. for some people, new year resolution means to loose weight and eat healthy, for some it is to save more and spend little. However, whatever your new year resolution is, you need a lot more than writing it in a sheet of paper or memorizing it in your head. You need courage, determination, discipline and most importantly God to make all your goals accomplished. I do have couple of goals or targets for the year, but sincerely I have realized within this few days of the year, that it’s more than just saying it. You have to begin to take action, take control of whatever it is and don’t turn your resolution into procrastination. some people would try to do one or two things on their resolution list for few weeks then give up.

Well, I want you to know you can’t keep giving up every time ooo. There is no such thing as small resolution. the fact is, it is so important that it gained your attention and you had to give it a number on your resolution list. Why don’t you let’s try it this way, maybe all this years you haven’t succeeded with your resolution, you thought it was a one man job. you thought you could attain and achieve those goals alone. Guess what? It’s time you realized no matter how little that resolution is, it’s that big that you can’t take hold of it!. Have you ever thought about that? Maybe you should start now. So, my advice is
1). Give the wheel to God and let him drive this year for you.
Well its just that one, it’s that simple.

Give the wheel of that resolution car, ship, boat, airplane, jet or however big it is to God, let him be in charge of it. Stop making it me, my resolution and I, start your year with God and see him direct your part. He will definitely teach you the way you should go and see 2016 take a glorious shift for you.
Well I have to stop right here oo, I have to go make dinner for Bae.
Talk to you soon, Pls don’t forget to share your 2016 resolution experience at the comment section.

Love
Jems.

Before you log out on 2015.

I looked back to see how far I have come, then I realized how long the road had been sincerely, I didn’t think I could make it. remembering the hours of waiting for doctors report, oh and the sleepless nights even when I took the most powerful sedative, thinking about how I had wish I’d just disappear into the thin air so the pain could go away. Dear lord, it’s been you! devil tried throwing all he could at me, but you shielded me and gave me a shock absorber.
He gave me love, he brought me joy, he raised me up, he crowned the year with a good story and in a blink of an eye, he turned everything around for my good. I could make “2015” a book title because my life this year has lots of   chapters, but he ended 2015 with happily ever after.

He has trained me to be tougher, wiser, better above all deeper in him. Trust me, if you thought you haven’t achieved all you wanted to this year, you need to sit back and recount your blessings because even in that awkward situation he blessed you. Sometimes we fail to notice how blessed we are, when we become too obsessed with self not to notice anything outside us. Everything you’ve been through this year isn’t an act of wickedness, God is never wicked and will never be. All he did was to train and prepare you. Did you know that?.

Go ahead into 2016 with a heart of gratitude, knowing for sure that someone up there has got your back, it doesn’t matter what your doctor has said, it doesn’t matter what your bank account is saying.

Go into 2016 empowered with a determination to make it better. Go into 2016 with a warriors heart,  never thinking of how you will fail before you even start.

Always remember ” to be ready, to be expectant, to be determined (RED) ”
The world awaits your manifestation, don’t let yourself down!.

Pls feel free to share your inspiring stories.
See you in 2016, looking forward to share my personal journey with you!.

Stay blessed.
With love,
Jems.

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